bipolar mom shares her insights on everyday life

Posts tagged ‘day off’

Put Your Feet Up!

Today is my day off.  Mondays, you know.  I finally resigned myself to doing this.  I know some of you may think that I’ve been doing it all along and enjoying it.  Well, truth be told, I haven’t really been taking Mondays off.  I usually find something that needs to be done, and I go do it.  Or, one of the kids asks to be taken somewhere, and I take them. 

I have realized that the weekends do pose a slight change in my mood on Monday.  I do well with structure, and the weekends just don’t work that way.  This summer is completely without structure other than cleaning tasks that the kids and I have each day.  So, to have just one day to not worry about the hectic (crazy) days, I get to do what I would like to do.  (Again, I highly recommend this to all people, not just bipolars.) 

Well, today my son asked me if he could go to a friend’s house, and I asked him to handle it without involving me.  So far, so good.  The kid’s mom is going to pick him up after lunch, and Tom will bring him back on his way home.

I am going to do laundry.  Not because it is needing to be done, but because I’ve kinda enjoyed it lately.  And, the feeling of doing a load or two a day makes me feel good.  So, even though to some that may be work, for me it is an enjoyable activity.  (Unless of course, mystery stains are involved, then I’ll just wait until tomorrow for those.)

So, I get to do what I want.  Like scrapbook.  Make cards.  Blog.

Take Care of Yourself

I’m taking the day off today.  It’s Thursday and I’m wiped out.  I’ve been helping with VBS and even though I am not in charge this year, I’ve been up a church a lot this week.  Plus, my daughter has had dance recital and practices all week.  And will have through the weekend, so that involves shuttling her to and from and  doing my part in volunteering.  But, today is my day to stay home.

I was able to go over to a friend’s house and help her start selling stuff on ebay.   I could sleep in without thinking that if I didn’t get up, I wouldn’t get much done at church, and I can lounge around in comfy clothes.

As I told my mom, if I don’t take care of myself, then I can’t take care of my family.  I learned that in MOPS.  And, it is so very true.  I realize I’m pushing it when I feel like I’m on the brink of crying more than once a day.

You know what else I realized today?  No one cared that I was taking today off.  What I mean by that is that I didn’t get any calls saying, “Where are you?  Can you come help?”  None.  Na da.  Zip.  That just shows me that I put more pressure on myself than others do, plus I have a great group of friends that understand me.

That is worth more than they can possibly imagine.  I’ll tell them that.  After my day off. 

Mom’s Day Off

Yesterday was my appointment with my therapist, Kent.  Love this guy.  He was impressed that I had started tracking my moods without it being suggested.  Yeah me!  🙂  So, he took a look at it and in the last 22 days, I’ve had 7 bad ones.  For those of you who are mathematically challenged, that comes out to about 33% of my days are not good ones.  He said he’s like to get that down to about 10%, which sounded good to me.  (And, by bad days, I mean days that I had crying spells that came out of nowhere and were pretty bad.  Afterwards, I would be exhausted.  It was not a cleansing cry.  I have those ever so often, and they are no big deal.)

So, trying to see a pattern, he noticed that most of my Mondays were bad ones.  So, he asked what our weekends looked like.  I told him that we really didn’t do anything in particular.  Everyone was home.  The kids usually want to go play at someone’s house or have someone come over.  We might run errands.  We go to church and Sunday School on Sunday.  No special routine or anything.  He asked me what  did.  I said that I was in charge of all the meals just like every other day.  I might be shuttling the kids around.  Whatever. 

Then he came up with a great idea.  He said, “Your husband works Monday through Friday, right?  And your kids go to school Monday through Friday?  So, Saturdays and Sundays are their days off.  Why don’t you take Monday off?”  My face brightened a little, as you can imagine.  He said, “Would your husband get the kids off to school in the morning on Mondays?”  I told him that I’m sure he would, but he really loves his sleep and likes to sleep in at late as possible.  Plus, I didn’t mind getting up at 6:00 and getting the kids off.  So then Kent said, “Well, would he make dinner?”  I said, “Absolutely!”  He said, “Well, it seems to me that your weekends leave you fatigued and stressed and that triggers your meltdowns.  So, maybe by having Monday off, you can avoid those.  No grocery shopping.  No appointments.  No laundry.  Just do what you want to do.  If you want to go to the bookstore, go.  If you don’t, don’t.  Don’t make any plans so you can do whatever you feel like that day.  If you want to lay in bed all day, then do it.”

I know, I know.  How much did I have to pay this guy to tell me this?  Twenty bucks.  Do you have to have major meltdowns to get a day off?  I don’t know, but I do know that my family (husband, mostly) seems to be more than happy to try this plan in order to prevent those bad days.  I realize that some people may think that now that I have eliminated all my activities and “cleaned my plate” what could I possibly be doing during the week that I didn’t want to do?  Don’t I already have those five days off?  I don’t know.  Maybe.  But, I can’t argue with the pattern on the calendar.  And, if all it takes is for my husband to be in charge of a meal once a week, isn’t that worth trying?  My husband and I think so. 

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