bipolar mom shares her insights on everyday life

Posts tagged ‘When Harry Met Sally’

My Favorite Movie is on TV!

My daughter just shouted those words earlier today.  Her favorite movie is “Three Amigos,” by the way.  And, it has been for several years.  She’s ten.  We bought her the DVD for her birthday about five years ago.  Yep.  Some girls think “High School Musical” revolutionized the movie industry.  Or, when they were five, they couldn’t get enough of “Beauty and the Beast.”  Nope.  Not here.  Steve Martin, Chevy Chase, and Martin Short have no idea how little their biggest fan really is.  Yeah, 0ur family has its quirks.

When Tom turned on the TV and started flipping channels, she saw it, and said, “My favorite movie is on TV!  Don’t change it!”  Tom pointed out that it was the end of the movie, but she didn’t care.  She wanted to watch those last 5 minutes.

What I found interesting was the fact that she could watch that movie any time she wanted.  She has the DVD.  But, the fact that it was on TV made it more enticing. 

But, honestly, I do the same thing.  If “When Harry Met Sally” showed up on TV, I’d sit and watch it, even though I own it.  Mark would watch any of the Harry Potters, and time stands still if Tom’s favorite “The Fifth Element” shows up.   Okay, honestly, I just pulled these out of the air.  We all have several favorites.  So if Tom and Mark read this (and they will), please don’t correct me and say, “Why did you say that (name of movie) is my favorite?  It is SO not my favorite.  My favorite movie is “Barney’s Adventures in Happyland” (or something like that).”  I was just giving examples.

So, why is it that we want to see it right then?  Even when just a portion of it is left?  And there are commercials?

In college, my friend wanted to watch “The Sound of Music”  one night.  We told her she could tape it and watch it later.  Her response?  “But, it’s not as fun as when you know that everyone else is watching too!”

Is that it?  Do we like the imaginary camaraderie? 

Ahhhh.  The great questions in life.  Will we ever find the answers?  Or are we doomed to roam this earth just searching…searching…searching…

Low Maintenance?

In one of my favorite movies, When Harry Met Sally, Harry has a great line when he talks to Sally at the beginning of the movie.  “You are the worst kind.  You are high maintenance, but you think you are low maintenance.”  That used to be me.  I’ve now come to the realization that I am HIGH HIGH maintenance.  Just ask my husband.

I haven’t been to my therapist since before Thanksgiving.  It’s been my choice, but lately I’ve been wondering why I decided to stop going.

Is it because I think I’m doing well enough to make it on my own?

Is it because I can’t imagine what we’d talk about?

Or, is it because I’m tired of working on handling different situations?

When I first left the loony bin, I was so scared to be out in the “real world.”  I didn’t know what I would be facing, how I would react, or even have the slightest idea of how to handle everyday life.

Seeing Kent was like grabbing on to a life preserver in the middle of an ocean.  I always knew I would be seeing him the next week, or the week after that.  I would keep record of the different situations that I had faced and bring them up during our sessions.  When I was finished, I was ready to take on the world!

I thought I was handling the pressures of Thanksgiving and Christmas really well, and then I had a meltdown.  If I could have gone to Kent, I would have in a second.  But, I knew I couldn’t get in right away, the meltdown subsided, and the need for Kent passed. 

A year ago, I was so very dependent on his insight and help.  Now, I feel like I am controlling my emotions much better.  But, there have been some signs that I could still use some work.  My fuse seems shorter than usual lately.  More like back to my pre-bipolar-diagnosis days.  But, a huge part of me is just not wanting to go to see Kent.

So, now, I’m trying to figure out why.  And, I think it is because I wouldn’t even know where to start.  My mind seems foggy when it comes to actual incidents that would cause me to blow.  When I get some alone time with Tom, things seem much better after that.  But, that’s a lot to put on him.  “My mental health depends on you and your support.  Good luck, Babe.”

I keep coming up with excuses as to why I’m so “testy”.  It’s because winter break was dang long!  (Geez-o.  We never had that much time off when I was in school!)  It’s because I may be going through some hormonal issues.  (I apologize to my male readers.  I probably should have warned you that the “h” word was coming.)  It’s because it’s 2009 and that’s an odd-numbered year.  (Okay, I made that one up, but I had to come up with something.)

I’m thinking I could probably benefit from going for a refresher in the next week or so.  I guess I don’t have to go in with an agenda.  By then, maybe my health issues will be solved, but if they aren’t he could probably help me with coping with that.

See?  This blog thing really works.  I started this by thinking I would convince myself that I didn’t need to go to Kent, and now I’ve done a 180.  Tomorrow I will call and make an appointment.  I can always cancel 24 hours in advance.  But, I will do my best not to fall into that trap.  While I feel like I’m just on a maintenance schedule, my family will most likely benefit from a few more sessions.

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